PRINT April 1992


A Girl's Own Story

I think I love you

but what am I so afraid of

I’m afraid that I’m not sure of

a love there is no cure for.

—David Cassidy, “I Think I Love You,”

The Partridge Family, 1974

SOMETIMES I WONDER what would have happened if I had come out in high school. If I had told the girl I sat next to in band that I thought she had the most beautiful hands in the world and I would give anything just to touch them. If I had told people I was gay, would shy girls have crept up to me in the locker room after gym and confessed their desire to be kissed?

As I watched six little video tapes by a 19-year-old named Sadie Benning, safely packed up memories came flooding back. Benning’s work is nothing less than a time capsule, autobiographical home movies that detail a girl’s coming of age. At 15 she began to weave her diary entries into experimental narratives. All of her tapes

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