Hey there. The novel excerpt included in my reading wasn't my own; it was actually taken from C. Bard Cole's “This is Where My Life Went Wrong,” which I discuss in the full essay that appears in the issue.
The “loser” mentioned is actually the writer Richard Kostelanetz, who also has a piece in the issue. Considering how prolific the guy is, I think calling him a “real loser” is a bit harsh (even if he did slap my hand for claiming that there's no such thing as minimalism in literature.)
Finally, I'm fairly certain that I didn't call myself a smelly homosexual. While I might be a failure as a writer, I'm wildly successful when it comes to personal hygiene.
Mr. Hultkrans has such feather-brushed and far-reaching runic permanence in his social assays it makes an older journal writer like myself run ruddy in remembrance. Oh my good old days! Splendid job on this one Andrew! All the elders and emeritus professors here at Eton whistle wet-toothed on your every next word. You are quite the popular one in our circles. Good job son!
I'd give it an IED.
I like the idea of kommaraderie between writers, but I'm afraid these sorts of events give me hives.
I can't remember if he called himself a smelly homosexual or not, but i could smell Jeppesen from the back row.